EDITORIALS

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February 13, 2012

All the single students

A short, not-so-sweet list of things for single students to do on Valentine’s Day.

It’s Valentine’s Day. You go to the U of C. Chances are, you’re single for this very special holiday—but that doesn’t mean you have to miss out on the fun. We’ve come up with some activities for you to enjoy while the couples continue to delude themselves:

1. Go for the classic: Buy a pint of Ben & Jerry’s, watch When Harry Met Sally, and weep.

2. Make “V-day” cards out of old Vita Excolatur mags to give to all your friends.

3. Volunteer in the community—you may be alone on Valentine’s Day, but you’re still luckier than a lot of people who could use your help.

4. Cook a nice group dinner with all your single friends.

5. Enjoy some alone time. Rinse and repeat.

6. Read about the martyrdom of Saint Valentine and resist the urge to picket outside of a Hallmark.

7. Go up to a stranger at the Reg and ask him or her out. No, really.

8. Go on reddit and upvote every “Forever alone” meme.

9. Call home—your parents love you whether or not you have a date tonight; just don’t call during theirs.

10. Write a memoir chronicling all the ups and downs of past relationships. Then burn it because it probably sucks.

11. Defriend all your friends in relationships on Facebook.

12. See a Bulls game—they play the Kings tonight, and Valentine’s Day means empty seats.

13. Go to Doc alone, sit right next to a couple, and weep.

14. Live your normal life. It’s midterm season, you don’t have time to mess around.

15. Write an op-ed submission for Viewpoints. Please.

16. Go to your professor or TA’s office hours and pretend like you’re on a date.

17. Visit the MSI—be a third wheel to the happy couple of Science and Industry; they won’t mind.

18. Explore a neighborhood. Do they celebrate Valentine’s Day in India? Visit Devon and find out.

19. Read craigslist missed connections and likealittles all night long, and weep.

20. Study in an obscure library. Get ahead on reading in Crerar while everyone you know is none the wiser.

21. Shopping spree at Kimbark Liquors. View this one as a last resort.

22. Eat your problems at Harold’s. We hear they’ll throw in a free plastic bag if you start crying mid-order.

23. Set up an OkCupid profile—so you don’t have to pull out this list again next year.

24. Take a squirrel out to dinner.

25. Buy a rose for the U of C’s most eligible bachelor: Peter Ianakiev.

The Editorial Board consists of the Editor-in-Chief, Viewpoints Editors, and an additional Editorial Board member.

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